Marriage counseling was a godsend only for one reason – “Axis” told us the last three years have been extremely trauma filled and we have merely been treading water, trying not to drown in the misery.
I believe her pronouncement of our dire situation has given me time to collect my thoughts and rely on Jennie Owen’s Dancing With a Porcupine for help! Jennie was a foster-to-adopt mom of three troubled children whose past caused secondary trauma to her own self.
What lessons do I value most from Jennie? It’s a toss up between how to talk with Boogs and how to protect myself. Recently, this means I have truly slowed down. Instead of cleaning the windows, I sat with the boys and watched Brother try to crawl. Instead of filling yet another load of dishes, I played hide-and-seek with Capt, Boogs and brother (kinda lol).
I have slowed down, and I’m trying to do better. I think it will really help Captain and I, if I’m not treading water to physically survive either.
My counselor and I are possibly doing EMDR to help my life of trauma, but it takes time to get there!
Please reach out and support your struggling friends. They need to know WHY you need/want them in your life. Just a simple, “Hi, I miss you,” can save a life.
Xo, Chelsea
Monday with the Morgan's 